Our little Miss Haliah Halleilie will be TWO on the 20th of April!!!
Shes such a sweet doll, so much fun! She loves CINDERELLA right now, I love how she says, "Rella purtty Rella"
she got a little white kitten as an EARLY birthday present from her nino.
The kitty sleeps with 'Siah and follows him everywhere. ;) he runs from Haliah most of the time but he is patient with
her :D
Kayla is doing softball again, over at her moms ;) SHES ONE GREAT BALL PLAYER. Hope we can go to some of her games!! Josiah did not do baseball afterall but is taking drum lessons and will be trying out for The Dinuba Aqua Emps swim team
WE ARE BLESSED
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Refreshing Rains falling
Weve finally gotten some rain! I love how it makes everything seem clean. Listening to my windchimes. The hubby brought me a warm cup of hazelnut coffee!!!
Ive been going to grief counceling. Almost four years later, but it sure is helping!
Haliah will be turning 2 next month!
Kayla turns 14 this summer!
Steve and I just celebrated our SEVEN YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!
He is thee absolute best husband ever
Feeling REFRESHED ;)
Ive been going to grief counceling. Almost four years later, but it sure is helping!
Haliah will be turning 2 next month!
Kayla turns 14 this summer!
Steve and I just celebrated our SEVEN YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!
He is thee absolute best husband ever
Feeling REFRESHED ;)
Monday, February 13, 2012
FEBRUARY 13th (4years later)
Four years ago TODAY, AT EXACTLY THIS TIME 4:00pm. Our lives were FOREVER CHANGED, By these two words: OCCIPITAL ENCEPHALOCELE. It was 4pm the medical staff was asking us tons of questions, giving an overload of information. We were sent over to see a genetisist, then to a lab to draw blood, then back to the doctors office ALL IN THE SAME BUILDING. IT WAS ALL A BLUR BUT A MOST SHOCKING PAINFUL BLUR.
My most closest cousin Bernice was at her obstetricians getting an ultrasound too and she and Cindy and my sister Beth were all texting me, ANXIOUSLY AWAITING IF WE WERE HAVING A BOY OR GIRL..........
(the rest of that days account is at the beginning/bottom of this blog in the archives)
Today, Monday February 13, 2012 FOUR YEARS LATER
WE ARE STRONGER, MORE IN LOVE, HAVE A STRONGER FAITH, LOVE DEEPER, HOPE LONGER AND BELIEVE IN MIRACLES EVEN STILL!!!!!
Today we have a daughter who is almost two. She is not Elijah's replacement. Watching her grow is a delight, a blessing, and yet Elijah is ALWAYS IN OUR HEARTS!!!
Today has been a great lounging lazy day. Enjoying the peace and quiet of OUR little three bedroom home in a new city.
My sister Beth and her family have moved back to California and My best friend lives in the studio in our back yard.
Kayla is at her moms this week. I love hearing from her during the week. Her mom, Janet and I have been able to start building somewhat of an amicable steady relationship. I can see how positively this has affected Kayla. Steve and Janet also are more tolerable of one another and are constantly working at improving their coparenting and communication. It is definitely STILL A WORK IN PROGRESS, but arent we all. ;)
Josiah is finishing up his wrestling season with one FOURTH place medal and three more tournaments to go. He is preparing for his first baseball season. Hes acctually pretty good and i credit that to his older sister Kakie :) She is one awesome softball player. We will hopefully make more of her games too, last season we made maybe three.
Haliah is starting to potty train. She loves putting on layers and layers of clorhes and undies over her pants HAAHAA
FOUR YEARS LATER AS THE SUN IS SETTING I LOOK OUT ONTO THE HILLS IN THE HORIZON AND STILL I SAY: " BLESSÉD
BE YOUR NAME JESUS, YOU GIVE AND TAKE AWAY; MY HEART WILL CHOOSE TO SAY BLESSÉD BE YOUR NAME!"
~love u forever 'Lijah~
:)
My most closest cousin Bernice was at her obstetricians getting an ultrasound too and she and Cindy and my sister Beth were all texting me, ANXIOUSLY AWAITING IF WE WERE HAVING A BOY OR GIRL..........
(the rest of that days account is at the beginning/bottom of this blog in the archives)
Today, Monday February 13, 2012 FOUR YEARS LATER
WE ARE STRONGER, MORE IN LOVE, HAVE A STRONGER FAITH, LOVE DEEPER, HOPE LONGER AND BELIEVE IN MIRACLES EVEN STILL!!!!!
Today we have a daughter who is almost two. She is not Elijah's replacement. Watching her grow is a delight, a blessing, and yet Elijah is ALWAYS IN OUR HEARTS!!!
Today has been a great lounging lazy day. Enjoying the peace and quiet of OUR little three bedroom home in a new city.
My sister Beth and her family have moved back to California and My best friend lives in the studio in our back yard.
Kayla is at her moms this week. I love hearing from her during the week. Her mom, Janet and I have been able to start building somewhat of an amicable steady relationship. I can see how positively this has affected Kayla. Steve and Janet also are more tolerable of one another and are constantly working at improving their coparenting and communication. It is definitely STILL A WORK IN PROGRESS, but arent we all. ;)
Josiah is finishing up his wrestling season with one FOURTH place medal and three more tournaments to go. He is preparing for his first baseball season. Hes acctually pretty good and i credit that to his older sister Kakie :) She is one awesome softball player. We will hopefully make more of her games too, last season we made maybe three.
Haliah is starting to potty train. She loves putting on layers and layers of clorhes and undies over her pants HAAHAA
FOUR YEARS LATER AS THE SUN IS SETTING I LOOK OUT ONTO THE HILLS IN THE HORIZON AND STILL I SAY: " BLESSÉD
BE YOUR NAME JESUS, YOU GIVE AND TAKE AWAY; MY HEART WILL CHOOSE TO SAY BLESSÉD BE YOUR NAME!"
~love u forever 'Lijah~
:)
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Monday, December 26, 2011
GOOD NIGHT FIVE, SEE YOU IN THE MORNING SIX YEAR OLD!!!
* IM BEING AN EMOTIONAL MOMMY* TOMORROW IS MY BIG BOYS 6th BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!! SIX!!!! oh five you were tons of fun, having a five year old was a life long dream, fullfilled!!! For some reason id always think "oh it must be so much fun to have a FIVE YEAR OLD" Josiah Steven Douglas, (i know someday you will be able to read this, since youre learning to read so fast!) I am so proud to be YOUR mommy. as Ive told you many many times since the day you were born, "YOU ARE MY PRECIOUS GIFT FROM HEAVEN"
Having you in my belly for almost eight months and waiting to hold you, wondering who you would look like, what you would like to do, Daddy and I always asked eachother do you think he will have YELLOW(blond) hair or BLACK well we all know YOU HAVE (in your exact words to date) "Lello eyes and Lello hair" YOUR PERSONALITY AND HEART LIGHT UP MY LIFE AND SINCE THE DAY I KNEW YOU I HAVE LOVED YOU. I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!!!!
I cant wait to see how much fun we will have in year SIX of your life!! Thank you son, for loving Jesus with all your heart, for being such a happy boy but most importantly i thank you son because you always listen to Jesus and share what Hes pouring into your heart!!!
I know weve had our sad days and our bad days and our mad days too But 'Siah the best is yet to come and like we Douglas' always say: Phillipians 4:13 I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH.
MOMMY LOVES YOU MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY AND IM THE HAPPIEST WHEN YOU SAY, "mommy you are my best friend" I LOVE THAT I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND SON!
C'mon BIG SIX LETS DO THIS!!!
Having you in my belly for almost eight months and waiting to hold you, wondering who you would look like, what you would like to do, Daddy and I always asked eachother do you think he will have YELLOW(blond) hair or BLACK well we all know YOU HAVE (in your exact words to date) "Lello eyes and Lello hair" YOUR PERSONALITY AND HEART LIGHT UP MY LIFE AND SINCE THE DAY I KNEW YOU I HAVE LOVED YOU. I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!!!!
I cant wait to see how much fun we will have in year SIX of your life!! Thank you son, for loving Jesus with all your heart, for being such a happy boy but most importantly i thank you son because you always listen to Jesus and share what Hes pouring into your heart!!!
I know weve had our sad days and our bad days and our mad days too But 'Siah the best is yet to come and like we Douglas' always say: Phillipians 4:13 I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH.
MOMMY LOVES YOU MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY AND IM THE HAPPIEST WHEN YOU SAY, "mommy you are my best friend" I LOVE THAT I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND SON!
C'mon BIG SIX LETS DO THIS!!!
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Photo Card
Picture Tree Christmas
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View the entire collection of cards.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
An Exciting Milestone for OUR first born.... hes not a baby anymore
Tonight after dinner, Steve walked into the dining room and says, "Siah put your shoes on son" Josiah smiles huge and says, "oh i know dad we're going on *spells(so Haliah doesnt cry)*
B-I-K-E!" Steve says no we're going to do a FATHER SON thing :) Siah smiles and I ask CAN I GO? Siah says, "mom you know you cant do any tough moves or stuff like boys do!!"
He PROUDLY walks out with his daddy and jumps in the truck!!! after quite a while they return and Siah is WALKING EVER SO TALL and says "MOM, THATS IT NOW, IM A REAL DINUBA WRESTLER!!! I'M A WRESTLER JUST LIKE MY DADDY AND MY NINO!!! and mom I can do this so dont freak out okay, im a tough kid and I'm a Douglas PLUS MOM REMEMBER, "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH JESUS CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH"
I'M PROUDLY, JOYFULLY, EMOTIONALY EXCITED!!!!! and i think i might cry at his first match HAAAHAAA
B-I-K-E!" Steve says no we're going to do a FATHER SON thing :) Siah smiles and I ask CAN I GO? Siah says, "mom you know you cant do any tough moves or stuff like boys do!!"
He PROUDLY walks out with his daddy and jumps in the truck!!! after quite a while they return and Siah is WALKING EVER SO TALL and says "MOM, THATS IT NOW, IM A REAL DINUBA WRESTLER!!! I'M A WRESTLER JUST LIKE MY DADDY AND MY NINO!!! and mom I can do this so dont freak out okay, im a tough kid and I'm a Douglas PLUS MOM REMEMBER, "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH JESUS CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH"
I'M PROUDLY, JOYFULLY, EMOTIONALY EXCITED!!!!! and i think i might cry at his first match HAAAHAAA
Friday, October 28, 2011
New Seasons, New beginnings; always carrying our Elijah in our hearts!
This passed week, during a conversation with Kayla, she told me, "mom we need to update our Elijah blog, because I was at school and I was asked how many brothers and sisters I have and I came onto Elijah's blog and mom we have tons of great memories on here"
SO HERE WE ARE!!!!!
Kayla is 13 years old and beautifully breathtaking; it isnt just her apprearance but her character, personality and heart of gold. She loves God with all her heart. She has on several occasions reminded us of the techings of faith we raised her on in the past seven years weve been a family. She encourages us and inspires us to never lose faith, to always keep the hope and to trust that God has a very special plan for our lives! Kayla is an OUTSTANDING softball player and her mom has done a great job inspiring her to aspire and dream big.
Josiah is just about to turn 6 in December; he still has a growing passion for worship and plays his guitar on the church worship team. He is attending kindergarten and loves to play baseball, and every other messy loud BOY thing :) he has recently started to spend SEVERAL minutes in front of the mirror "fixing his cool spikes" YIKERS!!!!!
Haliah is now 1 and a half. She has brought so much laughter and joy to our mending hearts :) Haliah LOVES baby dolls. she loves to follow Pator Stela around :)
We are living in Dinuba, (NEW UNEXPECTED BLESSING IN DISGUISE)
*PICTURES SOON TO FOLLOW PLUS A BLOG MAKE OVER :)*
SO HERE WE ARE!!!!!
Kayla is 13 years old and beautifully breathtaking; it isnt just her apprearance but her character, personality and heart of gold. She loves God with all her heart. She has on several occasions reminded us of the techings of faith we raised her on in the past seven years weve been a family. She encourages us and inspires us to never lose faith, to always keep the hope and to trust that God has a very special plan for our lives! Kayla is an OUTSTANDING softball player and her mom has done a great job inspiring her to aspire and dream big.
Josiah is just about to turn 6 in December; he still has a growing passion for worship and plays his guitar on the church worship team. He is attending kindergarten and loves to play baseball, and every other messy loud BOY thing :) he has recently started to spend SEVERAL minutes in front of the mirror "fixing his cool spikes" YIKERS!!!!!
Haliah is now 1 and a half. She has brought so much laughter and joy to our mending hearts :) Haliah LOVES baby dolls. she loves to follow Pator Stela around :)
We are living in Dinuba, (NEW UNEXPECTED BLESSING IN DISGUISE)
*PICTURES SOON TO FOLLOW PLUS A BLOG MAKE OVER :)*
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
STILL HERE!!!! (borrowed computer... YAY)
I have really missed blogging ALOT. I am able to access facebook on my cell phone but we still dont have internet in the house. WOW IT HAS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I WAS ABLE TO BLOG. THERE ARE PROBABLY NO MORE FOLLOWERS OUT THERE FOLLOWING US SINCE WE HAVE SORTA ABANDONED BLOG LAND. Ha ha ha!!!
So, UPDATE:
STEVE- has been working since the middle of December THANK GOD!!!!
KAYLA - is doing well SWEET AS EVER!!!growing up :) She went to her very first Youth group outing at the end of Spring Break and IT WAS SUCH A MILESTONE FOR ME & DADDY!! our baby girls all dressed up going out on her first youth group outing (WTIHOUT US) She went to the ROCKIN WORSHIP ROAD SHOW MERCEY ME CONCERT and five other bands. After wards she went to a sleep over and was ecstatic as she retold all the events of the concert and how they went to go eat after the concert and didnt get back to the house till 2:00 a.m the next morning, and how she woke up at 9:30 and she was so excited. They brought her back at 1:00 in the afternoon and she was so excited.
JOSIAH - is still silly and busy as ever. We have taken him out of pre-school due to transportation issues. (a little bit sad ) But I have been doing school at home with him. He still mentions Lijah almost every day. and he cant wait for the new baby to arrive. He kisses my belly and talks to baby several times a day.
ME - very very very pregnant!!!! I have about three more weeks till the c-section. I have had a roller coaster of emotions preparing to have a HEALTHY live baby that is EXPECTED TO LIVE HERE WITH US. not having to think of funeral plans, TRYING to sort through all the emotions of receiving gifts and setting up the baby room which I STILL have a hard time SAYING "NURSERY" like if i'm not allowed. LOTS OF EMOTIONS that I have to try to justify to almost everone EXCEPT GOD, STEVE, and MOM!
We are very busy right now trying to rearrange all of our bedrooms to accomodate the new little one. I have had somewhat of a difficult pregnancy (again) all 3 of my pregnancies have been a bit tough. IM TIRED and we are still not done setting up the baby room. God has continued to be THE FAITHFUL GOD that HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN. We continue to TRUST and RELY solely on Him.
Right now we still are having transportation issues but WE KNOW GOD WILL MAKE A WAY!
The doctor who delivered my precious Elijah is the same docor that is going to deliver this sweet baby. That has really made it much easier because he knows our history and he remember my sweet baby. That makes me feel good because I dont feel like he is being ignored.
I was BLESSED to have two baby showers and BOTH were a bit hard for me to go through and LOTS of people DID NOT UNDERSTAND how it was HARD, or how I " have not moved on" and how I can NOT "see this baby as a seperate blessing"
Maybe..... maybe its because they just arent able to comprehend I dont know, but it is so hard for me to know myself what and or why I feel "certain things" sometimes so I just try to no open up to other peoples comments.
I have really missed blogging. face book is different but this BLOG IS SUCH A SACRED PLACE, A PLACE I FEEL FREE TO SHARE ALL MY FEELINGS AND NOT GET JUDGED.
The one thing I am SO SCARED OF RIGHT NOW is ... in about 3 weeks I am going to have a new baby and I keep having these scarey thoughts of WHAT IF I DONT WANNA HOLD THIS BABY, WHAT IF I MISS MY SWEET LIJAH TOO MUCH, WHAT IF SEEING THIS BABYS HEAD CLOSED AND NO BRAIN SAC ON TOP MAKES ME SAD. AND THE OTHER THOUGHT THAT KEEPS RUNNING WILDLY ACROSS MY MIND IS.... " what if Elijah had lived? then this baby wouldnt be here and I honestly cant say WHAT that makes me feel but I FELL SOMETHING STRONG AND VERY INEXPLICABLE. WHAT IF I GET HURT FEELINGS WITH PEOPLES REACTIONS TO THIS BABY vs. how they reacted to Elijah.
At my 1st baby shower I had a very hard time opening gifts (we got mostly baby clothes and a stroller) I was sad because I didnt get to have that for my sweet baby Lijah but I was greatfull for the outpouring of love. At tthe 2nd shower it was also hard because both showers were at the exact same places where they made my Lijah shower(FUNERAL FUNDRAISER) so there were no cute clothes.
When I was pregnant of Elijah and we moved from Reedley to this house Josiahs crib fell out of the back of the truck on the highway so I thought Steve had gotten rid of it (since we knew Elijah wasnt gonna live here) and he acctualy had it in storage and recently we found out that the crib had been recalled but because the model numbers arent on the crib they cannot exchange it because we have no "proof " that it is the recalled crib. So I have been thrift store shopping for a crib and a changing table or a pack n play with the changer... ... looking for these items has been fun. The other day I became a bit frustrated because I havent found them yet and then I came to realize that I needed to be greatful that I am going to have a baby that gets to LIVE here with me. I remember saying over and over when I was pregnant with Elijah that I would give anything up IF ONLY he didnt have to go to heaven. So I resolved to not pout abut what I didnt have and be greatful for this new blessing. NOT 12 hours had passed when my phone rings and the person on the other side of the phone says they are sending us a baby bassinet!! Again GOD just being faithful.
BUT AGAIN... ... THOUGHTS OF LAST TIME vs. THIS TIME. Ugh it is such a struggle LAST TIME we were this far along in the pregnancy I was picking out burial plots and baby caskets, funeral outfits and wondering how I would manage to put a hat on his "SMART BOY BUBBLE", planning funeral songs and a euology for a son I wanted so bad to live, a child I carried in my belly for 9months plus two weeks and held in my arms for 25 and a half hours.
Last time my baby sister was pregnant 3 months behind me. My baby died hers lived. This time my baby sister AGAIN found out she is pregnant and has made a few "last time" comments not realizing how it cuts like a knife BECAUSE last time and this time are so painfully different.
SO YES I AM HAPPY WE ARE HAVING A BABY I MOST DEFINITELY AM!!! but I miss the one that I never got to bathe or bring home and rock.
Ive missed blogging mY SAFE PLACE TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS so even if all our blog friends no longer follow an abandoned blog I still cherish this place I hold so dear and miss visiting.
I will try to update in a few weeks ONCE I HAVE THIS BABY just in case anyone out there still reads our blog
IF ANY ONE WANTS TO FOLLOW US ON FACE BOOK JUST EMAIL US AT stv.mre@gmail.com and I will tell you how we can connect via face book, our FB account is private so email us :)
So, UPDATE:
STEVE- has been working since the middle of December THANK GOD!!!!
KAYLA - is doing well SWEET AS EVER!!!growing up :) She went to her very first Youth group outing at the end of Spring Break and IT WAS SUCH A MILESTONE FOR ME & DADDY!! our baby girls all dressed up going out on her first youth group outing (WTIHOUT US) She went to the ROCKIN WORSHIP ROAD SHOW MERCEY ME CONCERT and five other bands. After wards she went to a sleep over and was ecstatic as she retold all the events of the concert and how they went to go eat after the concert and didnt get back to the house till 2:00 a.m the next morning, and how she woke up at 9:30 and she was so excited. They brought her back at 1:00 in the afternoon and she was so excited.
JOSIAH - is still silly and busy as ever. We have taken him out of pre-school due to transportation issues. (a little bit sad ) But I have been doing school at home with him. He still mentions Lijah almost every day. and he cant wait for the new baby to arrive. He kisses my belly and talks to baby several times a day.
ME - very very very pregnant!!!! I have about three more weeks till the c-section. I have had a roller coaster of emotions preparing to have a HEALTHY live baby that is EXPECTED TO LIVE HERE WITH US. not having to think of funeral plans, TRYING to sort through all the emotions of receiving gifts and setting up the baby room which I STILL have a hard time SAYING "NURSERY" like if i'm not allowed. LOTS OF EMOTIONS that I have to try to justify to almost everone EXCEPT GOD, STEVE, and MOM!
We are very busy right now trying to rearrange all of our bedrooms to accomodate the new little one. I have had somewhat of a difficult pregnancy (again) all 3 of my pregnancies have been a bit tough. IM TIRED and we are still not done setting up the baby room. God has continued to be THE FAITHFUL GOD that HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN. We continue to TRUST and RELY solely on Him.
Right now we still are having transportation issues but WE KNOW GOD WILL MAKE A WAY!
The doctor who delivered my precious Elijah is the same docor that is going to deliver this sweet baby. That has really made it much easier because he knows our history and he remember my sweet baby. That makes me feel good because I dont feel like he is being ignored.
I was BLESSED to have two baby showers and BOTH were a bit hard for me to go through and LOTS of people DID NOT UNDERSTAND how it was HARD, or how I " have not moved on" and how I can NOT "see this baby as a seperate blessing"
Maybe..... maybe its because they just arent able to comprehend I dont know, but it is so hard for me to know myself what and or why I feel "certain things" sometimes so I just try to no open up to other peoples comments.
I have really missed blogging. face book is different but this BLOG IS SUCH A SACRED PLACE, A PLACE I FEEL FREE TO SHARE ALL MY FEELINGS AND NOT GET JUDGED.
The one thing I am SO SCARED OF RIGHT NOW is ... in about 3 weeks I am going to have a new baby and I keep having these scarey thoughts of WHAT IF I DONT WANNA HOLD THIS BABY, WHAT IF I MISS MY SWEET LIJAH TOO MUCH, WHAT IF SEEING THIS BABYS HEAD CLOSED AND NO BRAIN SAC ON TOP MAKES ME SAD. AND THE OTHER THOUGHT THAT KEEPS RUNNING WILDLY ACROSS MY MIND IS.... " what if Elijah had lived? then this baby wouldnt be here and I honestly cant say WHAT that makes me feel but I FELL SOMETHING STRONG AND VERY INEXPLICABLE. WHAT IF I GET HURT FEELINGS WITH PEOPLES REACTIONS TO THIS BABY vs. how they reacted to Elijah.
At my 1st baby shower I had a very hard time opening gifts (we got mostly baby clothes and a stroller) I was sad because I didnt get to have that for my sweet baby Lijah but I was greatfull for the outpouring of love. At tthe 2nd shower it was also hard because both showers were at the exact same places where they made my Lijah shower(FUNERAL FUNDRAISER) so there were no cute clothes.
When I was pregnant of Elijah and we moved from Reedley to this house Josiahs crib fell out of the back of the truck on the highway so I thought Steve had gotten rid of it (since we knew Elijah wasnt gonna live here) and he acctualy had it in storage and recently we found out that the crib had been recalled but because the model numbers arent on the crib they cannot exchange it because we have no "proof " that it is the recalled crib. So I have been thrift store shopping for a crib and a changing table or a pack n play with the changer... ... looking for these items has been fun. The other day I became a bit frustrated because I havent found them yet and then I came to realize that I needed to be greatful that I am going to have a baby that gets to LIVE here with me. I remember saying over and over when I was pregnant with Elijah that I would give anything up IF ONLY he didnt have to go to heaven. So I resolved to not pout abut what I didnt have and be greatful for this new blessing. NOT 12 hours had passed when my phone rings and the person on the other side of the phone says they are sending us a baby bassinet!! Again GOD just being faithful.
BUT AGAIN... ... THOUGHTS OF LAST TIME vs. THIS TIME. Ugh it is such a struggle LAST TIME we were this far along in the pregnancy I was picking out burial plots and baby caskets, funeral outfits and wondering how I would manage to put a hat on his "SMART BOY BUBBLE", planning funeral songs and a euology for a son I wanted so bad to live, a child I carried in my belly for 9months plus two weeks and held in my arms for 25 and a half hours.
Last time my baby sister was pregnant 3 months behind me. My baby died hers lived. This time my baby sister AGAIN found out she is pregnant and has made a few "last time" comments not realizing how it cuts like a knife BECAUSE last time and this time are so painfully different.
SO YES I AM HAPPY WE ARE HAVING A BABY I MOST DEFINITELY AM!!! but I miss the one that I never got to bathe or bring home and rock.
Ive missed blogging mY SAFE PLACE TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS so even if all our blog friends no longer follow an abandoned blog I still cherish this place I hold so dear and miss visiting.
I will try to update in a few weeks ONCE I HAVE THIS BABY just in case anyone out there still reads our blog
IF ANY ONE WANTS TO FOLLOW US ON FACE BOOK JUST EMAIL US AT stv.mre@gmail.com and I will tell you how we can connect via face book, our FB account is private so email us :)
Thursday, December 17, 2009
update
Just taking a few quick minutes to say hello and that we are doing well. Pregnancy going well. The other day MoriahI see was over and she walked right up to me and gave me the biggest warmest, longest and most tender embrace ever..... as she put her precious little head on my shoulder I couldn't help but whisper into her ear, "OH I MISS YOUR COUSIN" and the tears just began to flow.
I cant believe how much I think of my Lijah EVERY time this wonderful little girl walks around my house. Every time I see her doing something new. Her beautiful smile.
Her and Lijah would have only been 3 months apart and OH HOW BUSY AND FUN it would be to see them both playing and laughing.
I cant believe how much I think of my Lijah EVERY time this wonderful little girl walks around my house. Every time I see her doing something new. Her beautiful smile.
Her and Lijah would have only been 3 months apart and OH HOW BUSY AND FUN it would be to see them both playing and laughing.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
new baby news
16 week ultrasound shows preciously, perfect healthy baby!!! we found out what we are having but some of you have sent us emails saying to keep it a surprise so if you wanna know check us out on FB
Sunday, November 1, 2009
FYI
just want to let all our BLOG BUDDIES know that we will not be renewing our internet service contract and it is up this week. I will try to check in on occasion at the library.
Because we will no longer be at home I will no longer be able to post pictures which includes the ULTRASOUND PIC'S we will get this Friday :(
* remember to pray for us friday (BIG ULTRASOUND/ IMPORTANT TESTS) & i hope I can get to a computer to let you all know if K, Si & Lij will be getting a baby brother or sister :)!!!!
Because we will no longer be at home I will no longer be able to post pictures which includes the ULTRASOUND PIC'S we will get this Friday :(
* remember to pray for us friday (BIG ULTRASOUND/ IMPORTANT TESTS) & i hope I can get to a computer to let you all know if K, Si & Lij will be getting a baby brother or sister :)!!!!
Friday, October 30, 2009
SHINING BRIGHT!!! Pumpkin Gospel
THESE ARE THE FINISHED PRODUCT
For Some reason these pictures loaded backwards and I'm so tired I dont have the energy to sit here and put them in order :)
He was curious about shapes
MY BEAUTIFUL GIRL!!! She's trying out her make up for tomorrow
Daddy & kids carving
WOOO HOOO Check it out !! We got the tops off
This stuff is gooey said Kayla & Si says yeah its so goofy
Look @ mine mom!
We started out the evening by reading a wonderful story book called THE PUMPKIN GOSPEL. I purchased at Berean's Bible Store last year after christmas. I paid a whole .75 cents for this WONDERFUL book.
It talks about how we are similar to the pumpkin; full of 'mess up's or sins' but when Jesus comes into our heart he cleans us up takes away all our messyness then puts his light in us for all to see.
WE HAD A WONDERFUL EVENING!!!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
we are getting closer to our appointment date.... I gotta admit I AM VERY SCARED!
I know that statistics say the chances of another 'cele' baby are almost none and I am thankful for that but then there is my age factor and the higher chances of having a baby with Trisomy something or other (they are almost all lethal) and that's what we are very afraid of.... another funeral.
And please, no comments like "God would never do that" PLEASE,,,
WE HAVE BECOME FRIENDS WITH A VERY DEAR FAMILY THAT HAVE 2 PRECIOUS BABY BOYS IN HEAVEN
I am so afraid. I am afraid of how I would just totally lose it or fall apart
I know that statistics say the chances of another 'cele' baby are almost none and I am thankful for that but then there is my age factor and the higher chances of having a baby with Trisomy something or other (they are almost all lethal) and that's what we are very afraid of.... another funeral.
And please, no comments like "God would never do that" PLEASE,,,
WE HAVE BECOME FRIENDS WITH A VERY DEAR FAMILY THAT HAVE 2 PRECIOUS BABY BOYS IN HEAVEN
I am so afraid. I am afraid of how I would just totally lose it or fall apart
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