11 months...

My sweet 'Lijah was in my arms 11 months ago today at exactly this very moment. Mom called me this morning to see how I was feeling. She was thinkinf of our sweet 'Lijah.

I was sick all weekend with the flu & did not come to work yesturday.

Friday evening was quite eventful as far as "blessings" go.

A few months back I had written that my cousins baby had passed away. We ended up NOT going to the services... (long story short)

It was during that week, that we came in contact with The funeral director who handled our 'Lijah's funeral. During our brief conversation(remember the horrible incident with his secretary!) Our conversation that day was brief, but one of the first things He mentioned was that his secretary was no longer working at his funeral chapel and that she infact had moved out of State. (skipping forward)

Remember the people who took the deposit on 'Lijah's head stone went bankrupt. So my sweet boy still has no head stone/marker!!! [frustrating]

(skipping forward) We are comming up on our baby's 1st birthday! No head stone!!! I was having a SUPER hard time with that!! I remembered We had started a file for his stone with Brian so I called him (SKIPPING FORWARD)

Friday We met with Brian and He is giving us the best birthday present for our 'Lijah!!!!
His head stone is being made for us FREE OF CHARGE!!!!!

Oh I miss my baby boy! I can't explain the HUGE VOID in my heart and the emptiness in my arms! 11 months have passed since I held your soft warm body in my arms. I never got to see you roll over, cut your first tooth, sit up or hold your arms out to me!

But I am so glad Kayla & 'Siah got to hold you! even if I was too groggy to remember to take a family picture we all do have at least one picture with you.

Friday night 'Siah was talking about your house in heaven. We read the book "mommy please don't cry" His favorite page was the one where the story says their is lots of party's with the best chocolate cake ever!

Josiah wants us to have a birthday cake for you!!! I wish you were here sweetness!
I am glad to know that even if we are not together for your 1st birthday at least I know your not all alone!!! & I am comforted to know that heaven is a wonderful place.

Mommy's boss gave me your birthday & your heaven day off as holiday!! & we intend to spend it together with family & CELEBRATE YOU in our lives!!