tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-45790482973097397432024-03-14T01:58:08.023-07:00Elijah Nathaniel DouglasOur ENCEPHALOCELE BABY BOY,He Came into our lives to leave his footprint in our hearts and in a clay mold... WE NOW LOOK AT HIS CLAY FOOTPRINT AS A REMINDER, "WE MUST KEEP ON WALKING. OUR JOURNEY HAS'NT ENDED!" We will share our life here and how weve been forever changed by our SWEET 'Liji (Elijah Nathaniel Douglas)Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.comBlogger257125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-30634889356706517432012-04-14T14:16:00.003-07:002012-04-14T14:38:53.563-07:00Tip-Toe to TWOOur little Miss Haliah Halleilie will be TWO on the 20th of April!!!<br />Shes such a sweet doll, so much fun! She loves CINDERELLA right now, I love how she says, "Rella purtty Rella"<br />she got a little white kitten as an EARLY birthday present from her nino.<br /><br />The kitty sleeps with 'Siah and follows him everywhere. ;) he runs from Haliah most of the time but he is patient with <br />her :D<br /><br />Kayla is doing softball again, over at her moms ;) SHES ONE GREAT BALL PLAYER. Hope we can go to some of her games!! Josiah did not do baseball afterall but is taking drum lessons and will be trying out for The Dinuba Aqua Emps swim team<br /><br />WE ARE BLESSEDSteve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-24397213392833783172012-03-17T09:17:00.002-07:002012-03-17T09:27:49.314-07:00Refreshing Rains fallingWeve finally gotten some rain! I love how it makes everything seem clean. Listening to my windchimes. The hubby brought me a warm cup of hazelnut coffee!!!<br /><br />Ive been going to grief counceling. Almost four years later, but it sure is helping! <br /><br />Haliah will be turning 2 next month!<br /><br />Kayla turns 14 this summer!<br /><br />Steve and I just celebrated our SEVEN YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!<br /><br />He is thee absolute best husband ever<br /><br />Feeling REFRESHED ;)Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-83626995944186295762012-02-13T15:52:00.000-08:002012-02-13T16:51:57.899-08:00FEBRUARY 13th (4years later)Four years ago TODAY, AT EXACTLY THIS TIME 4:00pm. Our lives were FOREVER CHANGED, By these two words: OCCIPITAL ENCEPHALOCELE. It was 4pm the medical staff was asking us tons of questions, giving an overload of information. We were sent over to see a genetisist, then to a lab to draw blood, then back to the doctors office ALL IN THE SAME BUILDING. IT WAS ALL A BLUR BUT A MOST SHOCKING PAINFUL BLUR.<br /><br />My most closest cousin Bernice was at her obstetricians getting an ultrasound too and she and Cindy and my sister Beth were all texting me, ANXIOUSLY AWAITING IF WE WERE HAVING A BOY OR GIRL..........<br /><br />(the rest of that days account is at the beginning/bottom of this blog in the archives)<br /><br />Today, Monday February 13, 2012 FOUR YEARS LATER<br />WE ARE STRONGER, MORE IN LOVE, HAVE A STRONGER FAITH, LOVE DEEPER, HOPE LONGER AND BELIEVE IN MIRACLES EVEN STILL!!!!!<br /><br />Today we have a daughter who is almost two. She is not Elijah's replacement. Watching her grow is a delight, a blessing, and yet Elijah is ALWAYS IN OUR HEARTS!!!<br /><br />Today has been a great lounging lazy day. Enjoying the peace and quiet of OUR little three bedroom home in a new city. <br />My sister Beth and her family have moved back to California and My best friend lives in the studio in our back yard. <br />Kayla is at her moms this week. I love hearing from her during the week. Her mom, Janet and I have been able to start building somewhat of an amicable steady relationship. I can see how positively this has affected Kayla. Steve and Janet also are more tolerable of one another and are constantly working at improving their coparenting and communication. It is definitely STILL A WORK IN PROGRESS, but arent we all. ;)<br /><br />Josiah is finishing up his wrestling season with one FOURTH place medal and three more tournaments to go. He is preparing for his first baseball season. Hes acctually pretty good and i credit that to his older sister Kakie :) She is one awesome softball player. We will hopefully make more of her games too, last season we made maybe three. <br /><br />Haliah is starting to potty train. She loves putting on layers and layers of clorhes and undies over her pants HAAHAA<br /><br /><br />FOUR YEARS LATER AS THE SUN IS SETTING I LOOK OUT ONTO THE HILLS IN THE HORIZON AND STILL I SAY: " BLESSÉD<br /> BE YOUR NAME JESUS, YOU GIVE AND TAKE AWAY; MY HEART WILL CHOOSE TO SAY BLESSÉD BE YOUR NAME!"<br /><br /> ~love u forever 'Lijah~<br />:)Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-82432030056482175702012-01-15T20:25:00.000-08:002012-01-15T20:34:22.099-08:00PICTURES OF THE DOUGLAS FAMILY<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4Saiifef5SA/TxOon6ndOqI/AAAAAAAAAvI/y0cMT-tEhRI/s1600/194.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4Saiifef5SA/TxOon6ndOqI/AAAAAAAAAvI/y0cMT-tEhRI/s320/194.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698083357256923810" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uZOrSYlQ93g/TxOonqvRqgI/AAAAAAAAAu4/RawGe4vKgWQ/s1600/267.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uZOrSYlQ93g/TxOonqvRqgI/AAAAAAAAAu4/RawGe4vKgWQ/s320/267.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698083352994753026" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YbtNmJA0z4g/TxOonmiFesI/AAAAAAAAAus/Stq53Qkcm_U/s1600/060.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YbtNmJA0z4g/TxOonmiFesI/AAAAAAAAAus/Stq53Qkcm_U/s320/060.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698083351865686722" /></a><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8R7TFjAEw_g/TxOonePZ1BI/AAAAAAAAAuk/K2Gi-IcbQYw/s1600/184.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8R7TFjAEw_g/TxOonePZ1BI/AAAAAAAAAuk/K2Gi-IcbQYw/s320/184.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698083349639844882" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-S5xUlo3nYBQ/TxOonbECYiI/AAAAAAAAAuc/nOPohDjjtk0/s1600/102.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-S5xUlo3nYBQ/TxOonbECYiI/AAAAAAAAAuc/nOPohDjjtk0/s320/102.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698083348786864674" /></a>Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-69727453890399899742012-01-15T20:16:00.000-08:002012-01-15T20:24:02.710-08:00PICTURES OF KAYLA ANN DOUGLAS<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-B5JsKIbrVcg/TxOmPYUpgzI/AAAAAAAAAuM/o3tXNLXp_pw/s1600/1011.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-B5JsKIbrVcg/TxOmPYUpgzI/AAAAAAAAAuM/o3tXNLXp_pw/s320/1011.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698080736711115570" /></a><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Ug4jmrsYEu8/TxOmPCoExOI/AAAAAAAAAuE/Cafajy4Y4l8/s1600/522.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Ug4jmrsYEu8/TxOmPCoExOI/AAAAAAAAAuE/Cafajy4Y4l8/s320/522.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698080730887013602" /></a><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3xiKyt7PJow/TxOmOpaY8vI/AAAAAAAAAt4/Jh7X4jNPEfU/s1600/320.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3xiKyt7PJow/TxOmOpaY8vI/AAAAAAAAAt4/Jh7X4jNPEfU/s320/320.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698080724118729458" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZdizFnF7bs8/TxOmOmOJsUI/AAAAAAAAAto/u2jk_9_swoM/s1600/018.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZdizFnF7bs8/TxOmOmOJsUI/AAAAAAAAAto/u2jk_9_swoM/s320/018.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698080723262091586" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7fJWkcT0X8I/TxOmOdsCkjI/AAAAAAAAAtg/maQchXWYXtM/s1600/188.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7fJWkcT0X8I/TxOmOdsCkjI/AAAAAAAAAtg/maQchXWYXtM/s320/188.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698080720971534898" /></a>Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-78917414778198112542012-01-15T20:11:00.001-08:002012-01-15T20:16:09.208-08:00PICTURES OF JOSIAH STEVEN DOUGLAS<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hl24-7Vro5o/TxOkYgZrGII/AAAAAAAAAtU/f6eLj0txcWI/s1600/172.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hl24-7Vro5o/TxOkYgZrGII/AAAAAAAAAtU/f6eLj0txcWI/s320/172.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698078694475241602" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fp9XfOlu5lU/TxOkYWi-QyI/AAAAAAAAAtI/Sio8hPT5KeM/s1600/006.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fp9XfOlu5lU/TxOkYWi-QyI/AAAAAAAAAtI/Sio8hPT5KeM/s320/006.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698078691829891874" /></a><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KWAws00YEiE/TxOkX0gt97I/AAAAAAAAAs8/5IwpdfOZIP8/s1600/013.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 180px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KWAws00YEiE/TxOkX0gt97I/AAAAAAAAAs8/5IwpdfOZIP8/s320/013.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698078682693629874" /></a><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-UjiPrb0poJ4/TxOkXs8T20I/AAAAAAAAAss/lfKkOyQJQFI/s1600/172.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-UjiPrb0poJ4/TxOkXs8T20I/AAAAAAAAAss/lfKkOyQJQFI/s320/172.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698078680661875522" /></a><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-vH3ttJJQOEM/TxOkXqyLZ4I/AAAAAAAAAsk/1tBgUB9vvBw/s1600/107.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-vH3ttJJQOEM/TxOkXqyLZ4I/AAAAAAAAAsk/1tBgUB9vvBw/s320/107.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698078680082507650" /></a>Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-60633784348724511082012-01-15T19:59:00.000-08:002012-01-15T20:11:12.162-08:00PICTURES OF HALIAH HALLEILIE<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-cuAk11CV9dA/TxOig-5dzTI/AAAAAAAAAsY/jR-2We4BtRk/s1600/134.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-cuAk11CV9dA/TxOig-5dzTI/AAAAAAAAAsY/jR-2We4BtRk/s320/134.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698076641077349682" /></a><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-aQSQA9eDrzs/TxOignKH5bI/AAAAAAAAAsM/FRL1ZRA4gHE/s1600/218.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-aQSQA9eDrzs/TxOignKH5bI/AAAAAAAAAsM/FRL1ZRA4gHE/s320/218.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698076634704766386" /></a><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kLAFg9YItDA/TxOigLv6n8I/AAAAAAAAAsE/acvLahDNGzk/s1600/131.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kLAFg9YItDA/TxOigLv6n8I/AAAAAAAAAsE/acvLahDNGzk/s320/131.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698076627347087298" /></a><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ij6EZHR2GXQ/TxOigHGNQUI/AAAAAAAAArw/Oz1-i7MsXkE/s1600/020.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ij6EZHR2GXQ/TxOigHGNQUI/AAAAAAAAArw/Oz1-i7MsXkE/s320/020.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698076626098405698" /></a><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3HWdGPZKra4/TxOigLuQjuI/AAAAAAAAAro/7IRNNmdFywI/s1600/016.JPG"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3HWdGPZKra4/TxOigLuQjuI/AAAAAAAAAro/7IRNNmdFywI/s320/016.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5698076627340136162" /></a>Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-54552177793751533002011-12-26T21:28:00.000-08:002011-12-26T21:46:32.411-08:00GOOD NIGHT FIVE, SEE YOU IN THE MORNING SIX YEAR OLD!!!<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_D4_zmim1sI/TvlbO0gSxqI/AAAAAAAAApk/OwbtrogElz4/s1600/001.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 240px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5690679914329720482" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_D4_zmim1sI/TvlbO0gSxqI/AAAAAAAAApk/OwbtrogElz4/s320/001.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><div>* IM BEING AN EMOTIONAL MOMMY* TOMORROW IS MY BIG BOYS 6th BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!! SIX!!!! oh five you were tons of fun, having a five year old was a life long dream, fullfilled!!! For some reason id always think "oh it must be so much fun to have a FIVE YEAR OLD" Josiah Steven Douglas, (i know someday you will be able to read this, since youre learning to read so fast!) I am so proud to be YOUR mommy. as Ive told you many many times since the day you were born, "YOU ARE MY PRECIOUS GIFT FROM HEAVEN"<br /><br />Having you in my belly for almost eight months and waiting to hold you, wondering who you would look like, what you would like to do, Daddy and I always asked eachother do you think he will have YELLOW(blond) hair or BLACK well we all know YOU HAVE (in your exact words to date) "Lello eyes and Lello hair" YOUR PERSONALITY AND HEART LIGHT UP MY LIFE AND SINCE THE DAY I KNEW YOU I HAVE LOVED YOU. I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!!!!<br />I cant wait to see how much fun we will have in year SIX of your life!! Thank you son, for loving Jesus with all your heart, for being such a happy boy but most importantly i thank you son because you always listen to Jesus and share what Hes pouring into your heart!!!<br /><br />I know weve had our sad days and our bad days and our mad days too But 'Siah the best is yet to come and like we Douglas' always say: Phillipians 4:13 I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH.<br />MOMMY LOVES YOU MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY AND IM THE HAPPIEST WHEN YOU SAY, "mommy you are my best friend" I LOVE THAT I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND SON!<br /><br />C'mon BIG SIX LETS DO THIS!!!<br /><br /><photo id="2"><br /><br /><photo id="4"><br /><photo id="5"><br /><photo id="6"><br /><photo id="7"></div>Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-75091738882826389932011-12-08T21:23:00.001-08:002011-12-08T21:23:31.209-08:00Photo Card<div class="sflyProductPreviewWidget" style="width:425px; height:494px;"><div class="sflyProductPreviewWidgetTop" style="height:6px; background-image:url(http://cdn.staticsfly.com/img_/share/preview/msc/widget/top.gif);"></div><div class="sflyProductPreviewWidgetCenter" style="height:482px; padding: 0 6px 0 6px; background-image:url(http://cdn.staticsfly.com/img_/share/preview/msc/widget/bg.gif); background-repeat:repeat-y;"><div class="sflyProductPreviewLogo" style="width: 105px; height: 34px; padding: 14px 0 0 14px;"><img src="http://cdn.staticsfly.com/img_/share/preview/msc/widget/logo.gif" style="padding: 0; background: #ffffff; border: none; box-shadow: none;"></div><div class="sflyProductPreviewContainer" style="height:350px; text-align:center; padding: 0;"><a href="http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=0AatmjVw4aNmjnw&cid=SFLYOCWIDGET&eid=115"><img src="http://images-community.shutterfly.com/prs/v1/0AatmjVw4aNmlA/0AatmjVw4aNmlOaA/p/67b0de21b3127d902548/JPEG/1323408088000/0/" style="padding: 0; background: #ffffff; border: none; box-shadow: none;"></a></div><div class="sflyProductPreviewMessageContainer" style="height:55px; background-color:#f4f4e9; text-align:center; padding: 15px 0 15px 0; line-height: 19px;"><div class="sflyProductPreviewTitle" style="font-family: arial, sans-seris; font-size: 15px; color: #333333; font-weight: bold;"><span>Picture Tree Christmas</span></div><div class="sflyProductPreviewSEOText" style="font-family: arial, sans-seris; font-size: 13px; color: #333333;"><span>Create beautiful <a href="http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery" style="color: #6666cc;">photo Christmas cards</a> at Shutterfly.com.</span></div><div class="sflyProductPreviewViewCollection" style="font-family: arial, sans-seris; font-size: 13px; color: #333333;"><span>View the entire <a href="http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery" style="color: #6666cc;">collection</a> of cards.</span></div><img width="1" height="1" border="0" style="padding: 0; background: #ffffff; border: none; box-shadow: none;" src="https://os.shutterfly.com/b/ss/sflyshareprod/1/H.15/111?pageName=sharekey&c1=msc&c2=blogger" /></div></div><div class="sflyProductPreviewWidgetBottom" style="height:6px; background-image:url(http://cdn.staticsfly.com/img_/share/preview/msc/widget/bottom.gif);"></div></div>Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-12041637812270182602011-11-01T19:53:00.000-07:002011-11-01T20:07:35.825-07:00An Exciting Milestone for OUR first born.... hes not a baby anymoreTonight after dinner, Steve walked into the dining room and says, "Siah put your shoes on son" Josiah smiles huge and says, "oh i know dad we're going on *spells(so Haliah doesnt cry)*<br />B-I-K-E!" Steve says no we're going to do a FATHER SON thing :) Siah smiles and I ask CAN I GO? Siah says, "mom you know you cant do any tough moves or stuff like boys do!!"<br /><br />He PROUDLY walks out with his daddy and jumps in the truck!!! after quite a while they return and Siah is WALKING EVER SO TALL and says "MOM, THATS IT NOW, IM A REAL DINUBA WRESTLER!!! I'M A WRESTLER JUST LIKE MY DADDY AND MY NINO!!! and mom I can do this so dont freak out okay, im a tough kid and I'm a Douglas PLUS MOM REMEMBER, "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH JESUS CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH"<br /><br />I'M PROUDLY, JOYFULLY, EMOTIONALY EXCITED!!!!! and i think i might cry at his first match HAAAHAAASteve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-64744522522310049842011-10-28T10:43:00.000-07:002011-10-28T11:08:10.987-07:00New Seasons, New beginnings; always carrying our Elijah in our hearts!This passed week, during a conversation with Kayla, she told me, "mom we need to update our Elijah blog, because I was at school and I was asked how many brothers and sisters I have and I came onto Elijah's blog and mom we have tons of great memories on here"<br /><br />SO HERE WE ARE!!!!!<br /><br />Kayla is 13 years old and beautifully breathtaking; it isnt just her apprearance but her character, personality and heart of gold. She loves God with all her heart. She has on several occasions reminded us of the techings of faith we raised her on in the past seven years weve been a family. She encourages us and inspires us to never lose faith, to always keep the hope and to trust that God has a very special plan for our lives! Kayla is an OUTSTANDING softball player and her mom has done a great job inspiring her to aspire and dream big.<br /><br />Josiah is just about to turn 6 in December; he still has a growing passion for worship and plays his guitar on the church worship team. He is attending kindergarten and loves to play baseball, and every other messy loud BOY thing :) he has recently started to spend SEVERAL minutes in front of the mirror "fixing his cool spikes" YIKERS!!!!!<br /><br />Haliah is now 1 and a half. She has brought so much laughter and joy to our mending hearts :) Haliah LOVES baby dolls. she loves to follow Pator Stela around :)<br /><br />We are living in Dinuba, (NEW UNEXPECTED BLESSING IN DISGUISE)<br /><br />*PICTURES SOON TO FOLLOW PLUS A BLOG MAKE OVER :)*Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-89185884557753317302011-02-13T09:38:00.000-08:002011-02-13T09:46:48.875-08:00FEBRUARY 13th THREE YEARS AGO TODAY WE FOUND OUT ELIJAH WAS OUR PERFECT BABY BOY WITH HIS BRAIN OUTSIDE HIS HEAD. (ive gotta write in comment from ph)Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-43285643785955213002011-01-31T23:15:00.000-08:002011-01-31T23:17:08.190-08:00Its almost feb 13th... THREE YEARS AGO WE FOUND OUT ABOUT ELIJAHS HEAD.Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-49942772758898566802011-01-29T19:54:00.000-08:002011-01-29T20:10:29.816-08:00trying desperately to figure how to blog from my phoneSteve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-7131912865061856152010-04-14T23:06:00.000-07:002010-04-15T00:20:14.424-07:00STILL HERE!!!! (borrowed computer... YAY)I have really missed blogging ALOT. I am able to access facebook on my cell phone but we still dont have internet in the house. WOW IT HAS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I WAS ABLE TO BLOG. THERE ARE PROBABLY NO MORE FOLLOWERS OUT THERE FOLLOWING US SINCE WE HAVE SORTA ABANDONED BLOG LAND. Ha ha ha!!!<br /><br />So, UPDATE: <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">STEVE-</span> has been working since the middle of December THANK GOD!!!!<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">KAYLA - </span> is doing well SWEET AS EVER!!!growing up :) She went to her very first Youth group outing at the end of Spring Break and IT WAS SUCH A MILESTONE FOR ME & DADDY!! our baby girls all dressed up going out on her first youth group outing (WTIHOUT US) She went to the ROCKIN WORSHIP ROAD SHOW MERCEY ME CONCERT and five other bands. After wards she went to a sleep over and was ecstatic as she retold all the events of the concert and how they went to go eat after the concert and didnt get back to the house till 2:00 a.m the next morning, and how she woke up at 9:30 and she was so excited. They brought her back at 1:00 in the afternoon and she was so excited.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">JOSIAH - </span>is still silly and busy as ever. We have taken him out of pre-school due to transportation issues. (a little bit sad ) But I have been doing school at home with him. He still mentions Lijah almost every day. and he cant wait for the new baby to arrive. He kisses my belly and talks to baby several times a day.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">ME </span>- very very very pregnant!!!! I have about three more weeks till the c-section. I have had a roller coaster of emotions preparing to have a HEALTHY live baby that is EXPECTED TO LIVE HERE WITH US. not having to think of funeral plans, TRYING to sort through all the emotions of receiving gifts and setting up the baby room which I STILL have a hard time SAYING "NURSERY" like if i'm not allowed. LOTS OF EMOTIONS that I have to try to justify to almost everone EXCEPT GOD, STEVE, and MOM!<br /><br />We are very busy right now trying to rearrange all of our bedrooms to accomodate the new little one. I have had somewhat of a difficult pregnancy (again) all 3 of my pregnancies have been a bit tough. IM TIRED and we are still not done setting up the baby room. God has continued to be THE FAITHFUL GOD that HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN. We continue to TRUST and RELY solely on Him.<br /><br />Right now we still are having transportation issues but WE KNOW GOD WILL MAKE A WAY!<br /><br />The doctor who delivered my precious Elijah is the same docor that is going to deliver this sweet baby. That has really made it much easier because he knows our history and he remember my sweet baby. That makes me feel good because I dont feel like he is being ignored.<br /><br />I was BLESSED to have two baby showers and BOTH were a bit hard for me to go through and LOTS of people DID NOT UNDERSTAND how it was HARD, or how I " have not moved on" and how I can NOT "see this baby as a seperate blessing"<br />Maybe..... maybe its because they just arent able to comprehend I dont know, but it is so hard for me to know myself what and or why I feel "certain things" sometimes so I just try to no open up to other peoples comments.<br /><br />I have really missed blogging. face book is different but this BLOG IS SUCH A SACRED PLACE, A PLACE I FEEL FREE TO SHARE ALL MY FEELINGS AND NOT GET JUDGED.<br /><br />The one thing I am SO SCARED OF RIGHT NOW is ... in about 3 weeks I am going to have a new baby and I keep having these scarey thoughts of WHAT IF I DONT WANNA HOLD THIS BABY, WHAT IF I MISS MY SWEET LIJAH TOO MUCH, WHAT IF SEEING THIS BABYS HEAD CLOSED AND NO BRAIN SAC ON TOP MAKES ME SAD. AND THE OTHER THOUGHT THAT KEEPS RUNNING WILDLY ACROSS MY MIND IS.... " what if Elijah had lived? then this baby wouldnt be here and I honestly cant say WHAT that makes me feel but I FELL SOMETHING STRONG AND VERY INEXPLICABLE. WHAT IF I GET HURT FEELINGS WITH PEOPLES REACTIONS TO THIS BABY vs. how they reacted to Elijah.<br /><br />At my 1st baby shower I had a very hard time opening gifts (we got mostly baby clothes and a stroller) I was sad because I didnt get to have that for my sweet baby Lijah but I was greatfull for the outpouring of love. At tthe 2nd shower it was also hard because both showers were at the exact same places where they made my Lijah shower(FUNERAL FUNDRAISER) so there were no cute clothes.<br /><br /> When I was pregnant of Elijah and we moved from Reedley to this house Josiahs crib fell out of the back of the truck on the highway so I thought Steve had gotten rid of it (since we knew Elijah wasnt gonna live here) and he acctualy had it in storage and recently we found out that the crib had been recalled but because the model numbers arent on the crib they cannot exchange it because we have no "proof " that it is the recalled crib. So I have been thrift store shopping for a crib and a changing table or a pack n play with the changer... ... looking for these items has been fun. The other day I became a bit frustrated because I havent found them yet and then I came to realize that I needed to be greatful that I am going to have a baby that gets to LIVE here with me. I remember saying over and over when I was pregnant with Elijah that I would give anything up IF ONLY he didnt have to go to heaven. So I resolved to not pout abut what I didnt have and be greatful for this new blessing. NOT 12 hours had passed when my phone rings and the person on the other side of the phone says they are sending us a baby bassinet!! Again GOD just being faithful.<br /><br />BUT AGAIN... ... THOUGHTS OF LAST TIME vs. THIS TIME. Ugh it is such a struggle LAST TIME we were this far along in the pregnancy I was picking out burial plots and baby caskets, funeral outfits and wondering how I would manage to put a hat on his "SMART BOY BUBBLE", planning funeral songs and a euology for a son I wanted so bad to live, a child I carried in my belly for 9months plus two weeks and held in my arms for 25 and a half hours.<br />Last time my baby sister was pregnant 3 months behind me. My baby died hers lived. This time my baby sister AGAIN found out she is pregnant and has made a few "last time" comments not realizing how it cuts like a knife BECAUSE last time and this time are so painfully different.<br /><br />SO YES I AM HAPPY WE ARE HAVING A BABY I MOST DEFINITELY AM!!! but I miss the one that I never got to bathe or bring home and rock.<br /><br />Ive missed blogging mY SAFE PLACE TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS so even if all our blog friends no longer follow an abandoned blog I still cherish this place I hold so dear and miss visiting.<br /><br />I will try to update in a few weeks ONCE I HAVE THIS BABY just in case anyone out there still reads our blog<br />IF ANY ONE WANTS TO FOLLOW US ON FACE BOOK JUST EMAIL US AT stv.mre@gmail.com and I will tell you how we can connect via face book, our FB account is private so email us :)Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-73864049927343026062009-12-17T12:29:00.000-08:002009-12-17T12:37:52.693-08:00updateJust taking a few quick minutes to say hello and that we are doing well. Pregnancy going well. The other day MoriahI see was over and she walked right up to me and gave me the biggest warmest, longest and most tender embrace ever..... as she put her precious little head on my shoulder I couldn't help but whisper into her ear, "OH I MISS YOUR COUSIN" and the tears just began to flow.<br /><br /><br />I cant believe how much I think of my Lijah EVERY time this wonderful little girl walks around my house. Every time I see her doing something new. Her beautiful smile.<br /><br />Her and Lijah would have only been 3 months apart and OH HOW BUSY AND FUN it would be to see them both playing and laughing.Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-35445181944661891142009-12-01T19:59:00.000-08:002009-12-01T20:16:43.960-08:00new baby news16 week ultrasound shows preciously, perfect healthy baby!!! we found out what we are having but some of you have sent us emails saying to keep it a surprise so if you wanna know check us out on FBSteve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-82237708564430910602009-11-01T20:46:00.000-08:002009-11-01T20:51:26.006-08:00FYIjust want to let all our BLOG BUDDIES know that we will not be renewing our internet service contract and it is up this week. I will try to check in on occasion at the library.<br />Because we will no longer be at home I will no longer be able to post pictures which includes the ULTRASOUND PIC'S we will get this Friday :(<br /><br />* remember to pray for us friday (BIG ULTRASOUND/ IMPORTANT TESTS) & i hope I can get to a computer to let you all know if K, Si & Lij will be getting a baby brother or sister :)!!!!Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-22950195177916942872009-10-30T21:41:00.000-07:002009-10-30T22:16:01.392-07:00SHINING BRIGHT!!! Pumpkin Gospel<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvH1SzbXyI/AAAAAAAAAoM/du1izyNuT_s/s1600-h/P1010309.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvH1SzbXyI/AAAAAAAAAoM/du1izyNuT_s/s320/P1010309.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398628296728207138" border="0" /></a>THESE ARE THE FINISHED PRODUCT<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvH1MtPn7I/AAAAAAAAAoE/6HiYL6cYz7U/s1600-h/P1010302.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvH1MtPn7I/AAAAAAAAAoE/6HiYL6cYz7U/s320/P1010302.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398628295091658674" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvH0k7nB3I/AAAAAAAAAn8/hRV4eE4xp0I/s1600-h/P1010303.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvH0k7nB3I/AAAAAAAAAn8/hRV4eE4xp0I/s320/P1010303.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398628284414494578" border="0" /></a><br />For Some reason these pictures loaded backwards and I'm so tired I dont have the energy to sit here and put them in order :)<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFbuWp_zI/AAAAAAAAAns/b3B25ip5fmQ/s1600-h/P1010289.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFbuWp_zI/AAAAAAAAAns/b3B25ip5fmQ/s320/P1010289.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398625658423869234" border="0" />He was curious about shapes</a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFbNdZnEI/AAAAAAAAAnk/bedcktn3p9U/s1600-h/P1010288.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFbNdZnEI/AAAAAAAAAnk/bedcktn3p9U/s320/P1010288.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398625649593785410" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFaiS8e0I/AAAAAAAAAnc/XbJ_0TGPQS4/s1600-h/P1010285.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFaiS8e0I/AAAAAAAAAnc/XbJ_0TGPQS4/s320/P1010285.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398625638007208770" border="0" /></a>MY BEAUTIFUL GIRL!!! She's trying out her make up for tomorrow<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFad6a8UI/AAAAAAAAAnU/aSXX2HjpILA/s1600-h/P1010284.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvFad6a8UI/AAAAAAAAAnU/aSXX2HjpILA/s320/P1010284.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398625636830605634" border="0" /></a>Daddy & kids carving<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEHG5LSEI/AAAAAAAAAnM/D_Sm_rNCFmo/s1600-h/P1010282.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEHG5LSEI/AAAAAAAAAnM/D_Sm_rNCFmo/s320/P1010282.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398624204722227266" border="0" /></a>WOOO HOOO Check it out !! We got the tops off<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEGp0milI/AAAAAAAAAnE/uLCXEuKamPk/s1600-h/P1010280.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEGp0milI/AAAAAAAAAnE/uLCXEuKamPk/s320/P1010280.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398624196918413906" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEGdK8amI/AAAAAAAAAm8/tliB9x_8yC8/s1600-h/P1010279.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEGdK8amI/AAAAAAAAAm8/tliB9x_8yC8/s320/P1010279.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398624193522461282" border="0" /></a>This stuff is gooey said Kayla & Si says yeah its so goofy<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEFy0sVnI/AAAAAAAAAm0/k5keud5pSGw/s1600-h/P1010277.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEFy0sVnI/AAAAAAAAAm0/k5keud5pSGw/s320/P1010277.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398624182154843762" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEFpa7a9I/AAAAAAAAAms/X0Bx_Ufs_kk/s1600-h/P1010276.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvEFpa7a9I/AAAAAAAAAms/X0Bx_Ufs_kk/s320/P1010276.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398624179630861266" border="0" /></a>Look @ mine mom!<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDJoMoODI/AAAAAAAAAmk/SePXleBMtzI/s1600-h/P1010271.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDJoMoODI/AAAAAAAAAmk/SePXleBMtzI/s320/P1010271.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398623148510296114" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDJNoIDmI/AAAAAAAAAmc/rkEAj-FJJ7Y/s1600-h/P1010269.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDJNoIDmI/AAAAAAAAAmc/rkEAj-FJJ7Y/s320/P1010269.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398623141377871458" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDIwL6RBI/AAAAAAAAAmU/2BmSi_rU-LE/s1600-h/P1010267.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDIwL6RBI/AAAAAAAAAmU/2BmSi_rU-LE/s320/P1010267.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398623133474898962" border="0" /></a>We started out the evening by reading a wonderful story book called THE PUMPKIN GOSPEL. I purchased at Berean's Bible Store last year after christmas. I paid a whole .75 cents for this WONDERFUL book.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDIeg5KWI/AAAAAAAAAmM/ilbTiLgJCDY/s1600-h/P1010265.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDIeg5KWI/AAAAAAAAAmM/ilbTiLgJCDY/s320/P1010265.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398623128731068770" border="0" /></a>It talks about how we are similar to the pumpkin; full of 'mess up's or sins' but when Jesus comes into our heart he cleans us up takes away all our messyness then puts his light in us for all to see.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDH77RfnI/AAAAAAAAAmE/JTvhzSmBmaQ/s1600-h/P1010264.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KVPj_ol5X1g/SuvDH77RfnI/AAAAAAAAAmE/JTvhzSmBmaQ/s320/P1010264.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5398623119446474354" border="0" /></a>WE HAD A WONDERFUL EVENING!!!Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-30528284435799326472009-10-28T19:47:00.000-07:002009-10-28T19:59:50.900-07:00we are getting closer to our appointment date.... I gotta admit I AM VERY SCARED!<br />I know that statistics say the chances of another 'cele' baby are almost none and I am thankful for that but then there is my age factor and the higher chances of having a baby with Trisomy something or other (they are almost all lethal) and that's what we are very afraid of.... another funeral.<br /><br />And please, no comments like "God would never do that" PLEASE,,,<br /> WE HAVE BECOME FRIENDS WITH A VERY DEAR FAMILY THAT HAVE 2 PRECIOUS BABY BOYS IN HEAVEN<br /><br />I am so afraid. I am afraid of how I would just totally lose it or fall apartSteve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-8887527523937120712009-10-20T17:41:00.000-07:002009-10-20T17:56:48.126-07:00Dr. TodayWe had to make a 'special' trip to see the OB today. I was having some scary symptoms, which started on Sunday as soon as we got home from church. Steve put me on BED REST (ick) :)<br /><br />Siah had to go with us because the timing on the appointment would not let us get Si from school on time.<br /><br />I wasn't expecting them to do an ultrasound (again) but She wanted to make EXTRA SURE our little 'THUMBKIN' was okay.<br /><br />Steve was holding Si behind that corner curtain and just as Thumbkin apeard on the screen Dr. V looks over behind the curtain and says, "COME LOOK" and Steve gets up and walks over to the other side of me and Siah is in his arms and Dr. V looks at Si and says, "see your little sister or brother is dancing the macarena".........<br />(<span style="font-style: italic;">we hadnt exactky told Si... what we HAD told him was that we were praying for mommy's tummy to be okay and maybe Jesus would put a baby in my tummy</span> is all we had told him)<br /><br />I looked at him and his eyes were wide and he smiled huge and said,<br />Si: Mommy, Jesus did it, he did put a baby in your tummy Dr. finded the tiny baby!!<br />Steve, Smiling huge at our dancing baby :) YUP!<br />Me: Yes! baby boy Jesus put a baby in my tummy<br />Si: Uhu!!! I knew He would do that for me!!! (HUGE, GINORMOUS SMILE)<br />Dr V: Oh WOW you prayed for God to put that baby in there?<br />Si: YUP, IT WAS ME!!!!<br />Dr V: Oh okay well now you can pray for God to bring me a million dollars (laughing)<br />Si: Uh ... Mmm NO! (very serious)<br /><br />That was too funny, SO NOW WE DONT HAVE TO WONDER HOW or WHEN WE WILL TELL HIM ABOUT 'new baby'<br /><br />So on our way home Si starts making a mental list of ALL the things 'thumbkin' will neee andWE DONT have like : baby crib, baby clothes and of course A MONIE!!! LOL!!!Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-7107097398919092552009-10-11T21:08:00.000-07:002009-10-11T21:32:47.399-07:00Evaluating My Life...So who am I, Who was I, Who am I supposed to be? These are just a few questions that keep running in my mind.<br />WHO AM I? I am a fighter. I do not give up, give in or quit.<br />WHO WAS I? I was a lonely single woman who had nothing of great emotional value or life's real worth, so I buried myself in my career because by that I measured my success.<br />DO I REALLY WANT TO TURN BACK THE HANDS OF TIME? No, absolutely not! WHAT AM I SERIOUS?!?!?! why did I ever let that thought cross my mind.<br />WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO BE? I am supposed to be the wife and mother GOD set me out to be the day I met my wonderful husband and my daughter.<br />I am supposed to walk in confidence that HE WHO BEGAN A GOOD WORK IN ME WILL BE FAITHFUL TO COMPLETE IT. I am supposed to set my eyes on that High calling in Jesus Christ; a life of love, faith , hope everlasting a life of forgiveness and mercy, a life of complete surrender to His will knowing that if I seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness He will Add all that I have need of.<br />I am supposed to be confident in HIS plan for my life and the lives of my children and direction for my marriage.<br />I am supposed to believe HIS REPORT!<br />I am supposed to think on things that are lovely, virtuous and praise worthy.<br />I am supposed to BELIEVE THAT I AM MORE THAN A CONQUERER IN CHRIST JESUS and that I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH HIM WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH!<br />I am supposed to walk as a ROYAL PRIESTHOOD a peculiar people set apart.<br /><br />ENOUGH, IS ENOUGH I KNOW WHO GOD INTENDS FOR ME TO BE SO WHY DO I CONTINUE TO ALLOW MY DAILY CIRCUMSTANCES TO DICTATE AND ROB ME OF THE BLESSINGS I SHOULD BE RECIEVING THROUGH WALKING IN OBEDIENCE OF THE CALL TO MINISTRY IN MY LIFE!!<br /><br />I need to stand up under these trials knowing that GOD has called me to minister life to a people who need him! Enough allowing the enemy to intimidate me!!! Come what may, MY LIFE IS TO HONOR HIM IN EVERYTHING!<br /><br />We have been given much, We know that Elijah came to our lives for a very specific reason and we have recently lost sight of that. I must live in the fullness of THAT CALLING AND STOP allowing fear and finances or economy or people to paralyze my thought process.<br /><br />Josiah has been blessed with the love and talent of playing instruments and We as his parents need to encourage that.<br /><br />THAT IS WHO I AM!!!! a prayer warrior, a believer, and intercessor, a compassionate friend, A Godly Wife and Mother. I have been given the wonderful privelege of being a step mom which feels more like a real mom!<br />THATS ME!!!!Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-14848000354281999222009-10-07T23:04:00.000-07:002009-10-07T23:06:22.396-07:00Unexpected Waves ...the pain that surgesIt was 8:15 p.m. Siah was very tired and snuggling in bed. It has since been a little over 2 hours and my sweet boy is now starting to give in to sleepy eyes. He had been in bed for a short 15 minutes when I heard a very high pitched screamy cry. I ran to his room and as Steve came in right after me he turned on the light. Siah's eyes were filled with tears spilling down his precious little face. I hugged him and he pushed away and said, "we need to take Lijah something, I miss my Lijah baby" he held his throat with one hand and grunted, Oh mommy I dont know what to do? I am angry! Why Lijah had to go? How he will know I love him daddy?" then he breathed like a deep gasp then yelled, AaAAaaHHHHh! then he quickly covered his opened mouth and said, "what do I do? what do we do now daddy" I miss my Lijah baby!!!", "how do we give Lijah his monie, mommy?" [THE ENTIRE DIALOGUE WAS IN SOBS & TEARS]<br /><br />(I have no idea how I managed to stay strong through this.... I did shed a very few silent tears though)<br /><br />Steve went into our room and brought out Lijah's photo book and Lijah's memory box with his special hospital bracelets, a whisp of his hair, his shampoo and his monie.<br /><br />We spent the whole 2 hours looking at pictures SIAH CRIED MORE!! and as he turned the pages of the photo book he asked, "WHY THEY DONT TELL ME MOMMY?" i had no clue exactly what he was referring to as we kept looking at pictures which start from July 9th for the 25 & a half hours all the way to the Funeral July 16th he was pointing at pictures and mentioning people who went to see "Lijah's cemetery"<br />then he asked if Daniel (singer @ church) went to see Lijah and I said um remember Daniel sang for Lijah and he nodded & answered a teary, "Daniel sang All creation I sing you are my everything and I will door you, holy holy holy is Lord God and mighty (The revelation song by hillsong??) then he almost named every one in church and as he asked if they knew his Lijah I pointed all the people out in the photo book.<br /><br />After what seemed like FOREVER he agreed to let me tie up the bow on Lijah's memory box. Then we read the story that Kealoha read for us @ the funeral MOMMY PLEASE DONT CRY then we talked about heaven and then we read the book we were given by ANGEL BABIES - WE HAD An ANGEL INSTEAD.<br /><br />Then he cried some more and insisted that Tia Berba "minn" should NOT have taken him away from YA-YA by Lijahs white crib. I tried to explain that Berba was loving him and holding him and I showed him the picture that Berba DID NOT take him away but that Berba held him to give Lijah a kiss. He began to cry even louder and said, "MOM BUT I DIDNT WANT TO LEAVE" I DONT WANT LIJAH TO BE DIED, I LIKE HEAVEN BUT I WANT TO BE WITH MY LIJAH, MOM" and mom we should bring Lijah down but God dont let me to bring him and I dont hear the trumpet mom!"<br /><br />I finally managed to get him to close the photo book and the story books but I could NOT CONVINCE HIM TO LET ME PUT LIJAH'S MONIE back in the memory box.<br /><br />he asked me if he could please sleep with Lijah's monie, "please mommy I promise I will take care very good for Lijah's monie please"<br /><br />So my sweet boy is sleeping with Lijah's monie, his black "rock"(electric) guitar he played at Lijah's funeral services and the Heaven story book.<br /><br />But he would not fall asleep before calling, "MY YAY"(beth) on the phone to tell her how much he misses his Lijah real bad.....<br />* thanks Yay, & sorry u had to hear that so unexpectedly* LOVE U THOUGH!!!<br />THAT WAS I THINK BY FAR THE HARDEST THING I HAVE GONE THROUGH SINCE Lijah died. I mean back then we were very aware and expected to "feel" all that but today, today was a random day and aside from Si & I being feverish & chilled we were having a very good day!<br /><br />I know I have been asked by some, "DO YOU THINK YOU OVER EXPOSED HIM AT SUCH A YOUNG AGE?" those people who ask that question obviously DO NOT KNOW HOW BRIGHT & VERY AWARE OF things Siah is. there really would have been no way to keep such a real part of our lives from him.<br /><br />I have also been told that he picks up on the grief from US because WE HAVENT let[ it] go.... to those people I say obviously YOU have never lived 1 day in our shoes we do not press grief onto Si or K but it is a very real part of their lives just as well. We try to not let our children see us cry in excess but the tears are a real emotion we have.<br /><br />Tonight was totally unexpected.<br /><br />*HUGE SIGH*<br />I just wanna say a special thank you to all of you who have surounded us with love & prayers it has been such a trying year and a half. TO EVERY ONE IN OUR CHURCH WHO SURROUNDED US, TO YVONNE & THE ENTIRE HERNANDEZ FAMILY SIS ROSE for the food & Bro. Tony for the video & Motorcade service, Tina& Raquel Sorrondo, Samantha for singing, for Frank & Doug who stepped in and stood as pal bearers for Steve! Jimmy sor singing, Cassia for reading what I wrote, Allen for the beautiful plant that still blooms sitting on our front porch,ALL OF YOU I KNOW I should'nt have started mentioning names because so many of you made his life his memorial service SO PRECIOUS.Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-57094322645119311072009-10-01T18:03:00.000-07:002009-10-01T18:05:32.123-07:00HYSTERIA - HILLARIOUSLY<h3 class="UIIntentionalStory_Message" ft="{"type":"msg"}"><span class="UIStory_Message"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">HILLARIOUS</span>!!!!!!! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Siah</span> just put on his gloves to go out & play in the dirt..... I was buttoning up his sweatshirt & he SCREAMS @ the top of his lungs "<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">AHHHH</span> MY FINGER FELL OFF" & begins to cry <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">hysterically</span> as he jumps around like<span class="text_exposed_hide">...</span><span class="text_exposed_show"> he has ants in his pants. I grab his hand (while laughing) and fix the glove & the 'missing' finger!!<br /></span></span></h3><h3 class="UIIntentionalStory_Message" ft="{"type":"msg"}"><span class="UIStory_Message"><span class="text_exposed_show">Instantly he stops screaming and smiles as he wipes his dirty face (blushing) ;) and walks out to the back porch.</span></span></h3>* I STILL CANT STOP LAUGHING!*Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4579048297309739743.post-76406642875120086262009-09-30T07:33:00.000-07:002009-09-30T08:05:42.204-07:00Birthday CelebrationsJosiah attended 2 very exciting birthday party's this summer. Since those parties he has been asking when we are going to make him a birthday party. We told him we were going to try to make him a birthday party. Steve & I have been thinking of making his birthday party on December 5th, because we have always had bad weather and almost everyone is out of town on December 27th.<br /><br /><br />I began making a birthday guest list. We can't afford to have a party at a kids restaurant or a kids party place so we are praying for 'decent' bearable weather :)<br /><br />I was doing fine! I am the party planner in my family so I was starting to look around at dollar tree for any BOB the Builder stuff, haven't found any yet but I will keep looking.<br /><br />Moriah is turning one at the end of this month, and I have been bugging my sister to tell me a theme so I could make the invitations and get things rolling.... ..... well, yesturday she finally gave me the details I was wanting.<br /><br />I was making Moriah's invitations when IT hit me like a ton of bricks - My ONE year old didn't have a big celebration (not here any ways).<br /><br />We (his parents) went to the cemetery, blew bubbles, sang happy birthday ... ... ... BUT IT WAS NO HUGE HAPPY OCCASION; it was very emotional & we are happy that he is in heaven BUT I miss my little son!!!<br /><br />Yesturday was one of Lijah's worship Partner's Birthday's and I couldn't get her momma out of my heart.<br /><br />Her Zoe Beth turned 2years old yesturday. So for my friend Lyndsay that means 2 years that she has had to live here on earth with a heart string tugging heaven bound.<br /><br />So the other night Steve & I were walkig through K-mart and I noticed myself looking toward the 'baby' stuff. We were walking towards the pull ups for Siah and on one side was the cute baby items like car seats, strollers, swings & diaper bags and on the other side was 12 - 18 months "BOYS" pajamas... I felt like I wanted to scream, like I wanted to cry, I was angry, I was sad - I just about could feel Lijah in my arms 1 year ago but now all I had was this HUGE EMPTY heartache. I didn't get to plan his 1st birthday and I didn't get to purchase him any 'BIG' boy jammies.<br /><br />I said nothing. ALL this was going on inside of me while Steve & Si carried on about random stuff. As we continued walking towards the pull ups Siah said, "Oh look mommy - one for me one for Lijah" pointing to a package of Bob the builder sippy cups. I smiled at him and couldn't say any thing we just kept walking.<br /><br />I was glad to be out of that store, when we were done.<br /><br />It was just so wierd how on one side of the isle I was looking happliy & hopeful to what we are expecting in May and in the same moment I was broken by what we were missing & had lost.Steve+Marie Douglashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16378292220832148883noreply@blogger.com1